I have the pleasure of working with great minds and I get to help make them even better. I have an amazing client who went through a terrible break-up and she was able to turn this situation into a positive learning experience with my help of course!
Her and her boyfriend decided to move in together and he did not tell his close knit family about his move until after it already happened. His family blamed her and made her into a “scape goat”. She took the blame and tried to make the situation better but by doing that it only made it worse so she changed directions contacted a therapist and started working on herself. The first thing we decided together was to stop trying with his family and it worked and her and her boyfriend decided to break-up for a lot of reasons but mostly because of the situation with his family.
She went through the stages of grief and finally felt better. At that time I asked her to write a list of all the positives that came from her break-up and her experience with his family. This is what she came up with.
-the situation between my boy friend and his family over him moving out was NOT my fault.
-I learned that people have a hard time dealing with the truth and will try to find a scape goat if possible.
-I deserve respect no matter what the circumstance is.
-I want someone who is a person of actions not just words.
-I’ve learned to be compassionate with myself.
-It is okay to not be okay.
-It is okay to cry and let everything in me feel the hurt and let go.
-Maintain my own happiness and not let anyone get in the way of that
-Show forgiveness and kindness towards others even when they are mean
-Rise above a fight, I am better than that.
-I do have a family and I love them very much.
-I am not a bad person
-I am a fighter
-I have learned to be more patient with others
-I have grown up in the face of a bad situation
-Learned how to voice my needs more clearly
-Learned how to listen
-Learned that I want a man who will protect me against anyone/ anything who tries to harm me
-Accept mistakes and apologies
-I love myself for who i am and what i have been through
-I am determined to be better and stronger than when I first went into this situation.
We went through this list and I felt it was so powerful and asked if I could share with all of you so you can understand that the worse the situation is the more you can learn from it and you can rise above and become a better person for it.
Has anyone else used an experience to become a better person?
June 10, 2014