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Tag Archives: joy
Sparking Joy in Your Relationship
Are you on the tidying up kick? I’ve always been on the tidying up kick so I’m a bit amused by all this hoopla about this new show that tells how to tidy up. I do love the phrase, “Keep what brings you joy!” Pretty cool to think that you can find joy in things and only have what brings you joy in your life. So, who’s done it? Who has rid themselves of all that evil in your life? Do you only have folded clothes? Did you donate a bunch of stuff that doesn’t bring you joy? If you did, are you filled with joy now?
Umm, what’s missing from this picture? Let’s talk about how to bring joy to your relationship!
- Yes, it’s me not you – Next time you watch that show, go to that movie or anything, ask yourself if you want to do it or you’re doing it for your partner. If it’s just for them, let’s redo this and find things that make you happy.
- You feel supported by household chores – Have you found a way to find peace with the laundry? Do you enjoy sorting clothes? If the answer is big NO WAY, then hand that task off and find ones that you can handle. There is so much to do, make sure you’re doing the ones that work for you.
- I am an extrovert/introvert – Which one are you? If you are with someone who is the opposite of you (of course you are), you’re probably doing a lot of compromising on what brings you joy. Find things to do that make you happy. Go to the concert or stay at home for the day. Don’t wait for your partner to bring you joy, figure it out together.
- Those kids are both of yours – Please split up parenting responsibilities. Even better, have them do things on their own. Children are supposed to be a joy, right? Let’s figure out a way to make them part of your joy.
I’m going to stop there because this is about your joy, not mine. I really want to focus on the fact there are no rules here. Forget what someone is telling you to do and do what makes you happy. There is “Couples Time” where you compromise and there is “YOU” time which means it’s all about you.
Find your joy in yourself and bring it to your relationship!!
Can’t wait to hear what brings you joy and if your partner is high or low on your joy list!
Emotions, who has them and why?
I saw the movie Inside Out this past weekend with my family. It was a great movie and had an even greater lesson in it which most people would not recognize but me being me, I had to recognize and share with all of you.
So if you know the movie, it is about a girl who has emotions in her head. They are joy, sadness, anger, disgust and fear. Joy is the main emotion and she is always trying to stop the other emotions from overtaking her turn. Well, sadness is the main emotion that joy has a problem with which if you saw the movie, it turns out that joy and sadness get kicked out of main headquarters because joy does not think that sadness should be a part of Riley’s core memories.
Who else believes this? That sadness is a wrong emotion and should not be a part of our core memories? As it turns out joy realizes that whenever she is around that sadness is also there as part of the emotions and that joy and sadness go hand-in-hand together. So, in order to get the emotions back on track once they got back to headquarters, sadness needed to take over and fix everything. Why, you ask would sadness need to fix everything? Because, sadness was and is the correct emotion. Why are we so afraid to be sad?
Sadness is a necessary emotion to help us get our stress out, fix our problems and get closer to the ones we love. It helps us make decisions and learn how to love, apologize and how to try again. When you try to block this emotion from your head you are missing out on so much of your emotions.
If this movie or me teaches you anything, is that emotions are okay no matter which one you feel. Just feel it and work through it and you will get back to joy eventually. If you block out sadness, anger, disgust or fear, then joy will not be real. You need all of your emotions to successfully feel and learn how to share how you feel.
So go ahead and feel sad today, but then feel anger, disgust, fear and once you are done understanding all of your emotions then you can feel joy and really mean it!