When most people hear the word intimacy, their mind first goes to the physical aspects of a relationship. While physical intimacy is important in a relationship, there are more ways to be intimate with your partner than just that.

Maybe things haven’t felt right for a while in your relationship. You might feel distant from your spouse or partner as if you aren’t connecting meaningfully. Or, there may have been a situation resulting in a loss of trust, and now you can’t find common ground again.

Whatever the reasoning, loss of intimacy in a relationship is normal. While it’s challenging, many couples will notice an ebb and flow to their relationship and overall health. However, that does not mean there aren’t ways to let yourself be intimate with your partner.

What Is Intimacy?

First, let’s define the different types of intimacy in a relationship. A couple will have two main areas of intimacy — physical and emotional. Physical intimacy, of course, can refer to things like sex, hugging, kissing, or even something as simple as holding hands.

Emotional intimacy is just as important as those things, however. It includes the connection you feel with another person, how well you relate to them, and the amount of trust, understanding, and honesty within a relationship.

How to Increase Intimacy In A Relationship

Change Things Up

There likely isn’t a couple who hasn’t fallen into the same cycle with their partner. Over time, you stick to the same routine that you are used to. You go to the same places for date night, cook the same things for dinner, or spend your time together in the same ways.

Don’t be afraid to shake things up. Are routines comfortable and safe? You know what to expect, and humans like to know that. But don’t feel shy about changing things up, whether in the bedroom or in general. Try new activities or hobbies together that might seem interesting. Try that new restaurant in town that you typically wouldn’t think about going to.

In many ways, doing something new with your partner can help you feel the spark again. They do say, after all, to never stop dating your partner.

Show Each Other Gratitude

At the beginning of your relationship, you likely spent plenty of time appreciating your partner. Over time, many couples will slowly stop showing their appreciation for each other. It’s not that they don’t; you just tend to forget to. You may know you appreciate them, but do you think they know that?

Remind each other of your appreciation. Thank each other for the little things, like taking out the garbage or unloading the dishwasher. Thank them for cooking dinner or doing something for you that took time out of their day.

Doing these little things can go a long way in bringing back intimacy into your lives.

Communicate With Each Other

This may seem like a given, but it often is not that easy. It’s not uncommon for one partner to assume that the other knows how they feel. Or that they know their thought process or reasoning behind a certain action. You should never make assumptions that your partner will automatically know something. That is why communication is vital, whether you have been together for 2 years or 22.

Be sure that you treat one another with respect when communicating. Yes, there are going to be disagreements. There will be times when you honestly can’t stand to be in the same room as them. However, remember this is the person you are choosing to be with.

Treating each other with respect, openly communicating, and being honest with each other can help you feel more connected at the end of the day.

If you are struggling with intimacy in your relationship, don’t hesitate to reach out to learn more about couples therapy. You can get to the root cause of what is happening in your relationship to cause a lack of intimacy and, most importantly, find ways to repair it.