I have seen such a shift in what the word betrayal means and how trust is broken down. It has definitely become a passion of mine to help couples understand that:

• You can repair your relationship after a betrayal and;
• Breaking trust is breaking trust.  Your relationship defines what that means so if you feel as if you have been betrayed then guess what?  You are correct.

Let’s break down some areas of betrayal that most people think are okay but in reality they aren’t.

• Porn– This one is okay as long as your partner knows what you are doing and doesn’t feel neglected because of you watching porn.  If it is a secret then you are breaking trust by not sharing and um…. Why does it need to be a secret anyways?

• Social Media– This again can be innocent or not depending on how you are viewing things.  If you are liking posts that your partner wouldn’t necessarily want you liking, yep that’s NOT okay.  If you’re posting pictures of your family, your trips, etc yep that’s okay.

• Money– Yep, if i hear someone say that oh I bought something but have to hide it from my partner, the trust is broken.  Don’t hide, just say it loud and clear!

• Friendships– If you have to hide your friendship for any reason, then there might be something that is going to happen.  Better be open about who you are talking with and how often you are talking to them.

The gist of these things is that when you feel like you have to hide something from your partner, then you are potentially breaking trust.  Just learn to share even if it is hard.  If you feel that you’re doing something that will hurt your partner if they find out and that is the reason you are not sharing, well then you will eventually hurt your partner anyways.

Trust = Communication

I can’t say that loud enough, so I will say it again Trust=Communication.

Let’s not have any miss conception of values and intentions.  Be open and honest and then we don’t have to worry about small betrayals leading to breaking trust.