Relationship Styles

Okay, we have all heard the term “opposites attract” and when they do, conflict arises because you have two people that look at life/relationship styles. Let’s learn a bit about the different relationship styles and find out which one fits best for you!

Conflict-Avoider Style: Generally prefers little disagreement. If there is a issue, prefers to discuss the issue completely, but not try to influence partner or persuade partner or be persuaded by the partner. Feels that the passage of time will often solve problems. Will drop the topic or just agree to disagree. Generally feels that anger is a dangerous emotion and believes in protecting the relationship from anger. Believes it is best not to dwell much on the negative in life, but to roll with the punches and emphasizes the positive. Prefers having traditional roles in the relationship. Often does things separately.

Volatile Style: Enjoys a good debate and argument. It is fun, and there is a lot of humor and teasing and affection in a good discussion. Values being direct and honest, even if this is sometimes painful. Also prefers doing a lot of things separately. Definitely things that the expression of anger and most emotions is healthy and natural in a relationship.

Validating Style: Values togetherness above all things in the relationship. Prefers arguing about some things, but not a lot. Values listening before trying to persuade one another. Places a high value on compromise. Believes in expressing anger, but is very careful to buffer partner from too much anger.

Yes, you can be a combination of one, two or even all three. The important point here is that both you and your partner need to know how each other deals with conflicts and which style fits your personality and based on your style is how you deal with conflicts.

Which style are you?